Friday, July 18, 2008

blame thrower

so i am in the long and lovely process of shedding my extra baby weight. like most new moms i step on the scale with both dread and anticipation. unlike most new moms i do it A LOT. it started with the 4am feeding, on the way back from the kitchen with baby's bottle i would detour into the bathroom and step on the scale, watch the little "0" scroll across the screen until a number larger than i ever wanted to see pops up. despite the number, it made me feel good, there was always progress compared to the 4am detour the day before, and for some reason, my body is it's lightest at 4am. now that there is no 4am feeding, the 630am weigh-in is not so gentle on my ego. my progess has somewhat plateaued and i am looking to blame anyone or anything other than myself. today i blame the scale. mostly for displaying numbers that make me want to cry, move to tibet and become a monk who doesn't have to fit into his 'going out jeans', fasts for days on end and drinks delicate wines (minus the wine bit, i would get a wine headache), but also for leading me into a false sense of weight loss security. it defies logic.

exhibit a.
630am - weigh-in...0...0....0...1xx. (you didn't actually think i would type in the number did you?)

631am - severe depression threatens to take over my entire day

1018am - on a trip from the kitchen to the bedroom, i pass by the scale and decide to get a 'second opinion'

1020am - weigh=in...0...0...0...1xx (-3)

1021am - rationale session begins... so i've somehow lost 3 pounds by sitting on my ass, typing on my computer, and participating in a conference call. hmmm...

1055am - rationale session ends. i decide to just be happy that i did not gain 3 pounds by sitting on my ass, typing on my computer, and participating in a conference call.

1100am - pep talk to myself begins...remember your philosophy: 9 months to put it on, 9 months to get it off. you still have 2 months left, and you can SO do this. yes, you will have to actually get up in the mornings and run, but you are doing well with your eating and adding the excercise will make you feel great, and better yet, you will LOOK great too.

thanks, me, i needed that.


Michelle said...

I saw you like what, 3 weeks ago and you looked great! And really considering the calculation of your progression you must have lost even more weight since I saw you. Blame it on Zach. Afterall with this whole baby-thing all he had to do was have sex. You had to carry Dutch, give birth to him, feed him, etc etc etc. Clearly, he is to blame.

Missie Rose said...

throw your scale away!

LIZZY said...

when i too weigh 120lbs whilst being 9 months pregnant, then and ONLY then will there be any scale throwing.

but thanks for the suggestion.