Thursday, January 15, 2009

it is what it is

so after wiping the tears out of my eyes and off my cheeks and examining what's left of my make-up (asking myself why i am so determined to be a minimalist and why can't i be one of those high maintenance types who always carries her make-up bag with her) in the women's bathroom of my office, trying to make myself look like i wasn't just crying and armed with the excuse "it's just allergies; i was NOT crying", i head back to my office.

gah! i hate days like this.

ironically, i sit down and click on penelope trunk's blog - brazen careerist - and read this:

"5. Don’t cry at work

Newsflash. Women cry a lot and men don’t. So let’s just stop telling women to be men at work. No point. People who do best in their careers are people who are their true selves.

And, I have first-hand research on this topic, because I have cried at all levels of my career. To be fair, I cry mostly when I have PMS. But whatever. PMS is just your body telling your brain that you need to start crying about the stuff that you've been ignoring all month.

Here’s the big secret about crying though. Men who are secure with themselves and their position in the world actually deal with women crying just fine. So any guy at work who cannot deal with you crying needs to get some therapy in order to be more self-assured. You, on the other hand, are doing just fine with those workplace tears."

full blog here

thanks, P! i needed that.



becki said...

I was talking about this exact topic with a friend of mine not long ago. She said that a lot of men think that when women cry at work it's because they can't/don't know how to deal with a situation. But actually, crying IS dealing with the situation.

I haven't cried at my current job yet (but I did at my previous), but when I get frustrated or overwhelmed or hurt at work, I can go to the bathroom, cry it out for a sec/min. and then I'm good to go. I am calm and able to be professional and deal with whatever or whomever I need to.

Plus, I also never carry make up with me. Well, lip gloss, but lip gloss isn't about to fix my "allergy eyes."

Love you!

Lolly said...

Crying is so good for us. Why do we wait so long before we let it happen? I agree with Becki, crying IS a way of dealing with something.

ed said...
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